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How to Help
Do Plan activities--invite and offer transportation. Don't be disappointed if he/she declines your invitation.
Do offer a helping hand with child or pet care, house sit, take care of yard work. Do offer help with housecleaning-or if you see a need, start in.
Don't judge. Believe in his/her ability to get through grief in his/her own way and his/her own time.
Do offer your skills to assist with organizational & clerical support such as writing notification letters, helping with the finances, or helping with the thank you notes.
Do Touch - hold hands, give hugs.
Do Share memories. Don't avoid conversation about the one who has died.
Do prepare meals or offer an invitation to dine out.
Do ask "What can I do?" Be sincere about what you are willing to do. Know your limits. Only make offers if you can follow-through an them.
Do support his/her emotional show of feelings--anger, guilt, sadness, fear.
Do offer to stay over or invite them to stay with you.
Do make available personal resources i.e. a weekend stay at a beach cabin, hot tub, use of VCR, etc.
give yourself time.
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